Valentine’s Ash Wednesday 2024
If you’re reading this from the future, it’s another Ash Wednesday/St. Valentine’s Day (2024, not to be confused with 2018 Ash Wednesday/St. Valentine’s Day).
It is also the final day of National Marriage Week, and I think it is perfect. It can be a wonderful, deep, beautiful, powerful reminder of what true love actually means and what marriage is really like.
How do we honor his day, honor true love, honor our spouses and significant others, while also paying due homage to the beginning of Lent?
Remember, the most popular Valentine legend says that after third-century Roman Emperor Claudius II outlawed marriage, Fr. Valentine continued to marry couples in secret. He recognized that marriage is a sacrament instituted by God, meaning the State didn’t have the authority to ban it at all. Despite his courage, Valentine was ultimately discovered and beheaded.
Similarly, layman Valentine fell in love from behind jail bars. Despite his circumstances, he did not close off his heart. He lived for Christ and His Church, to the point of death, and still allowed himself to hope.
When you think about it, third-century couples married under Fr. Valentine experienced their own “fasting.” They married in secret, without 100 of their closest friends, and certainly without a four-hour reception with music and dancing.
Those who inspired our Valentine’s Day celebrations knew how to fast. They knew how to deny themselves the pleasures of life while still offering praise and gratitude. They married, they fell in love, and they persevered. They could have given up in their circumstances but instead trusted God.
As Catholics, we shouldn't find this juxtaposition surprising. We see beauty and hope and everlasting life on the cross.
I want to remind you of that Croatian wedding crucifix tradition that I've been going on about this week.
When a bride and groom enter the church, holding their crucifix together, the priest says:
“You have found your cross. And it is a cross to be loved, to be carried, a cross not to be thrown away, but to be cherished.”
Christ must be the center of our marriage. Don’t let your wedding day be the best day of your life. Maybe the most exciting, maybe the most intimidating, but let the rest of your life together be filled with hundreds of “best days.” With that comes dying to self and willing the good — willing God and holiness — for your spouse.
My husband and I will be celebrating St. Valentine’s Day by going to Mass. We will be given ashes on our foreheads. We will fast. We will abstain. We will receive the Eucharist into our bodies as we prepare for this penitential season.
We will still celebrate our love, as the martyred Valentines would want; just as God wants.
May God bless you and your marriage (present or future) on this Valentine's-Ash-Wednesday-End-of-National-Marriage-Week-Day.
